Saturday, October 31, 2020


Whining. Nothing frustrates me more. Well, stupidity might equally rank. For clarification, when I say stupidity, I am not referring to ignorant people. Ignorance can be mitigated, but there is no cure for stupid. Anyways, back to whining. For many years, my husband and I organized foreign mission trips for youth 16 years old and through college age. We traveled to many places including some third world countries. Taking a group of 35 or more youth, who the majority had never been out of America, had its challenges. We, however, only had one rule – NO WHINING!

*Whining does not fix or change anything.

*Whining comes from a miserable person and creates an atmosphere of misery for everyone nearby.

*Whining is negative.

*Whining comes from an insatiable moaner, grumbler, complainer.

Life deals everyone good and bad, happy and sad. This is not about the occasional days when things are less than expected, rather about the chronic whiner who never sees good in anything. Instead of waking up grateful for breath, they wake up complaining the sun is in their eyes. They gripe about their job rather than be glad they have a paycheck. Responsibilities are shirked in exchange for laziness, which is followed by complaints of all that needs to be done and excuses of why it is not done. There is no magical umbrella that prevents life’s rain from occasionally splattering us.

Reciting woes will never “fix it” or bring happiness. A whiner must come to an understanding that to be better, requires change. Even praying for God to give the desire of one’s heart has requirements. Psalm 37 preempts the desire by first stating, “Delight thyself in the Lord.” In other words, one must first be happy, pleased, joyful in God. A long face with whining lips will never be granted what is most desired.

Having been in ministry for a lifetime, I have witnessed the struggles of people. Unemployed, employed but stressed, married wishing they were single, single wishing they were married, depressed, financially bankrupt, chronic pain, abused as a child, abused as an adult, grief-stricken from loss of loved ones, mental illness, frustrated, impatient, frequent panic or anxiety attacks, afflicted, lonely, and the list can continue. What I have learned in observing these people, is their attitude and mindset has an overwhelming influence on their improvement or lack of overcoming. Understand this – there is no perfect life. Even prominent characters in the Bible had struggles. Paul had a thorn in his side, David suffered depression, Joseph endured rejection, Elijah faced fear, Jeremiah dealt with loneliness, and Christ experienced it all. No one understands better than Him, yet He continued to give, heal, save, and love. His enemies were also recipients of His goodness.

So, STOP THE WHINING! It will not twist God’s arm, it won’t give you what you want, it will cause people to avoid you, it will shelve your talents, and rob you of happiness. Your countenance reflects your spirit. Are you entering a room with a dark cloud over your head or bringing in a ray of sunshine? Do you present helplessness or hope to those around you? Until you learn to be content regardless of your circumstance, your grandiose dreams and wishes will be ever elusive. It is time to dig in the Word, accept God’s will for your life (NOT your will, but His), and be content therein.

As for me, any day this side of the dirt is a good one. This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and BE GLAD in it.

P.S. Here are a few scriptures to consider (all from KJV; emphasis mine):

“Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to BE CONTENT.” – Philippians 4:11

“But godliness with CONTENTMENT is great gain.” – I Timothy 6:6

“And we know that ALL things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” – Romans 8:28

“…they that seek the Lord shall NOT WANT any good thing.” – Psalm 34:10

“I CAN do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” – Philippians 4:13

Monday, May 25, 2020

Love Extravagantly

A portion of scripture from family devotion was, "We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love." - I Corinthians 13:12-13 (The Message)

STRAIGHT TALK: "Why?" "I don't understand!" "This doesn't make sense!" These are probably some thoughts you, too, have recently had. I have to admit I have more questions than answers. My only hope is in my faith. For those who question having faith, this is my answer. Archaeologists have found enough things to support the validity of the Bible. i.e. Noah's Ark (on Mt. Ararat), Dead Sea Scrolls, remains from Masada, and more. Therefore, if the Bible is true, then my only hope is in God. I must live according to His plan, walk by faith, trust in Him, and more than anything else love. That is, love extravagantly.
Hang in there, friends, for surely better days are ahead. If not, and this is the beginning of the end, then heaven is the next destination. Either way, it is a win. As my son's quartet sings, "All's well that ends well."

Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Are You Tough Enough?

“A spoken reprimand is better than approval that’s never expressed. You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another.” – Proverbs 27:5, 17 (The Message)

“Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you.” – Luke 6:26 (KJV)

STRAIGHT TALK:  Be tough enough to accept correction or constructive criticism. Flattery, compliments, and adulation, builds ego rather than good character. This may go against popular psychology in a self-centered world clawing for attention but, the Word says we are not of this world. The last I checked, it also said pride is the precursor to destruction. So, be humble, don’t sweat being reprimanded, criticized, or corrected. It is good for you.  Oh, and be reminded time will prove all things.

Friday, February 12, 2016

Be Content and Give Thanks

When I hear people complain about America, I want to ship them to a third world country where they can see real poverty, serious starvation, disease ravaged bodies, begging lepers with fingers gone, malnourished children with spindly legs, distended bellies, and orange hair, open sewers leading into the ocean, a few blocks further ladies washing their few pieces of clothing in that same water, the twisted, crippled bodies dragging themselves down the road begging for a few bites to eat, and naked children who have never had clothes or shoes. Oh, but take note that those poor people are happy. They dance, sing, and children play with rocks and rubbish. 

 Before returning the whining American home, he or she would be served fly covered rice out of a dirty bowl on the ground. He or she could squat with others and use their right hand only to reach into the bowl to eat because the left hand is dirty. After returning to America, I doubt they would find our country to be so bad after all. 

 You think things are bad? It could be so much worse. I've been there, seen that, lived there, and was ready to kiss the ground when I came back to the USA. Yeah, this is part of the reason I struggle to tolerate whiners. It's time to be content and give thanks.

Wednesday, February 10, 2016


"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want." - Psalms 23:1
"It is more blessed to give than to receive." - Acts 20:25

Straight talk: The "give me, give me, give me" mentality has permeated our culture to a point people stampede others while rushing into a store for something they want but don't truly need. Yet, scripture tells us it is better to give than to get. What does that mean? Here's the deal - happiness derived from getting is short lived but, the happiness that comes from giving lasts forever.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Love Is the Greatest of All

"If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.  Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love." - I Corinthians 13:1, 13  (The Message)

“On the other hand, if you give one of these simple, childlike believers a hard time, bullying or taking advantage of their simple trust, you’ll soon wish you hadn’t. You’d be better off dropped in the middle of the lake with a millstone around your neck." - Mark 9:42, also found in Matthew 18:6 and Luke 17:2 (The Message)

Straight Talk:  Don't even think about hurting a little one, someone new in Christ, someone just beginning their walk with the Lord, one of God's children.  In other words, love them no matter what.  Love them whether you like them or not.  Love them whether you think they are right or not.  Let God and their pastor work with them.  The best thing you can do is pray and love.  Love!  Love!  Love!  It is the greatest of all.

Sunday, February 7, 2016

Strength In Unity

A good word from my son:

"Where there's drama, there's division.
Where there's division, there is no unity.
Where there is no unity, there is failure.
There is not strength in numbers but strength in unity."
- Blake Allard speaking at AGC's Monday Night Prayer

Friday, February 5, 2016

Overcome Haters

Haters – a word that was foreign when I was child but has become quite common in our self-centered world.  As much as I dislike the word and the character it portrays, haters are here.  Haters in our world, haters on our jobs, haters in our schools, haters in our churches, and even haters in our families.  So, the question is what to do?  Quit our jobs?  Drop out of school? Leave our churches?  Forsake family?  The answer is “NO!”  It isn’t the job hating, it isn’t the school hating, it isn’t the church or the whole family hating rather it is a minority; a thorn in the flesh.  So, don’t walk away from all that is good to you because of a hater but take the four step biblical approach.

     1. “Be Gentle” - A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. (Proverbs 15:1)

     2. “Pray” - Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you. (Matthew 5:44)

     3. “Forgive” - But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.  (Mark 11:26)

     4. “Love” - This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.  (John 15:12)

I admit these four steps are not always easy but they are always best.  Choose to do what God would do.

For those who believe my life is a bed of roses, let me give you some understanding - roses have many thorns but I choose to display the blooms and not the stinging daggers.  Yes, I have had haters; worked with some, attended church with some and more but I refuse to allow a hater to control me.  I take charge of me, control me, and do my best to follow God’s instructions albeit sometimes tough.  Overcome the haters and become a conqueror.

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Live Life Happily

Frustration happens, disappointments come, wounded hearts and sick bodies are inevitable - it is just life. Yet, even though you cannot stop all of these things from happening, there is something you can control. You, and only you, can control your attitude and your responses. Choose happiness and choose peace. Some people have lost "years" of what could have been great days because they responded unwisely and caused their day and everyone else's day to be ruined. Life is too short to let every little thing ruin your day. Live life to the fullest and live it happily.

Monday, February 1, 2016

Avoid Anger

The Bible is much more than a guide to salvation but also an instruction manual for everyday life.  Below is a collection of scriptures that addresses anger.  I found it interesting that Colossians lumps anger with slander and filthy language.  So, if you have anger issues, rather than pay for anger management classes, learn from the Word and conquer anger.  If you don't know what to do with an angry person, there is instruction for that, too. 

Proverbs 15:18 - A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.

James 1:20 - for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

Proverbs 22:24 - Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go. (KJV)
Don’t hang out with angry people; don’t keep company with hotheads. Bad temper is contagious—don’t get infected. (The Message)

Proverbs 29:11 - A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

Ecclesiastes 7:9  - Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.

Proverbs 15:1 - A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Proverbs 16:32 - Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.

Colossians 3:8 - But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.

Proverbs 14:29 - He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding: but he that is hasty of spirit exalteth folly. (KJV)

Slowness to anger makes for deep understanding;  a quick-tempered person stockpiles stupid. (The Message)

Saturday, January 30, 2016

Change and Conquer

Characteristics, mannerisms, attitudes, temperaments, and perspectives are usually developed early in life through the influence of parents, teachers, and siblings. Sometimes a person develops character flaws but they don’t realize there is anything wrong because they have never known or learned otherwise. To make a change, one must be objective enough to honestly search, find, and then admit there is a need to change. 

Some common problems to search for and that can be conquered are fear, worry, negativity, jealousy, bitterness, hatred, lack of self-control, anger, and there are more. Life gets so much better with each overcoming step.

Thursday, January 28, 2016

Feel the Real

A little thought on real versus fake.  In my earlier years, I worked in banking and daily handled large sums of money.  There was a time I could count money so fast, the bills seemed a blur as I flipped them through my fingers.  It was an interesting job – meeting people, giving good customer service, learning how to recognize crooks, and I even survived a couple of robberies.  Prior to the bank opening in the mornings, a few of us would count deposits from the night drop vault.  We would gather around a long, table and chat as we hurriedly counted bundles of bills.  One morning, I was talking with the other girls, not really looking closely at the money, yet I suddenly stopped counting.  I flipped the bills the opposite direction, stopped again, and pulled a bill out of the strap.  It didn’t “feel” right.  Upon closer inspection, I recognized it was a counterfeit. 

Here’s the thought I want to share with you:  when you are daily around the real, you learn exactly what real feels like.  I don’t need to be around fake to recognize fake.  Knowing the real has taught me. Beyond currency, I can feel the difference between leather and pleather/vinyl or the difference between cotton and poly.  From a distance they may look the same but up close, the difference is obvious.  In addition, counterfeit doesn’t last.  You may ask why are there so many fakes?  That answer is simple.  It is people who want the real, like the real but, don’t want to pay the price for the real.  There are markets that are full of copycat items but the quality is not there.  Girls, the handles on that fake Louis Vuitton purse from the market will soon expose the truth but, the real leather Louis Vuitton purse handles seem to form to your hand better with each time you carry it.  The leather softens to fit your touch. 

Quality costs but quality lasts.  You want the best for your spirit?  Get the real; you can feel it.  Not some cheap, imitation but, feel the real deal.  It only takes one touch of the Master's hand.

Monday, September 14, 2015

Stop Hate, Start Peace - Love

"Hatred starts fights, but love pulls a quilt over the bickering." - Proverbs 10:12 (The Message)
Straight talk: feuds are fueled by hate. Love may disagree but it will squelch anger. A flood of hate has consumed the world around us with violence. It is prideful, egocentric, haughty, arrogant, pretentious, all-about-me-all-about-I-I-I people who spew hate. Love is humble, quick to serve, puts others first, and has genuine compassion for humanity.
Stop hate and start peace – love.

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Pray More

Prayer is not a spectator sport. If you want to see a miracle, look less and pray more.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Walk the Talk

Develop values so you can "walk the talk." Values are "rules" for living which are your deeply held beliefs demonstrated through your behavior. Values "talk" while behaviors "walk." Your values declare your character.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Never Dull and Boring

Go ahead and chuckle. I not only giggled but I laughed till I cried when this goofy character showed up in my house. This past fall, my oldest son Bryce signed a contract for his first full-time teaching job as a middle school music teacher. The first picture is of him directing one of his classes at their winter program. As professional as he can look and act, there are those occasions he decides to be a goober. He found a fake cigarette in some of his stuff and the next thing that shows up in the living room, is this redneck. A few months before Christmas, he made a comment about wanting a pirate hat. Not only did I find him the hat, I also found a pirate shirt. Soon after opening his gifts, he went to his room and reappeared as a pirate. I am very proud of my son and his accomplishments this past year but, I also enjoy the fun he brings into our home. Life is never dull and boring around him.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Healthy Relationships Are A Two-Way Street

"She didn't even speak to me." "He walked right by be and wouldn't even look at me." Have you ever heard statements similar to these or even made such a comment? Throughout my lifetime of working with people, I would have to say, I have heard such remarks many times and I have a standard reply. That is, "Did you speak to them?" If it was not so pitiful, it would be funny. The fact is, there are many people who live in such a self-centered world. Yes, I said it; self-centered because they believe everyone should come to them, do for them, without returning anything. A relationship is not solo. It requires interaction between two. If a person always gives and never receives anything in return, that person will eventually give up on trying to maintain the relationship and search elsewhere for a friend. Healthy relationship are two-sided; a partnership of giving and receiving. Yes, relationships are a two-way street.

Monday, January 9, 2012

They Walk Amongst Us

Yes, "they" walk amongst us. Who? Negative minds, stubborn spirits, hateful hearts, or "they" are sometimes referred to with common names such as idiots, jerks, egomaniacs, haters, and the list can continue. These types of characters are often the source of our frustrations however, such frustration is allowing "them" to control us. So, what should we do? Here are my recommendations upon facing "them":

Smile, say "Hello," and keep moving.
Don't give them an audience in which to spew their ignorance.
Be kind.
Don't retaliate and stoop to their level.
Be strong.
Resist the urge to defend yourself.

Finally, remember time proves all things. Yes, "they" walk amongst us but our responses determine how much control they attain. We can't stop "them" from walking amongst us but, we can determine how much power they are given over us.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Do You Mean What You Pray?

The past few days, I have been thinking about prayer and some of the things people say when they pray. Do they really mean everything they say? When they ask God to do something, are they sure about what they are asking?

Have you ever heard someone pray, "Show me your ways, Lord." I wonder if the Lord were to suddenly show them His path of affliction and suffering if they would still want God to see His ways? Or, they ask God to send a revival. Really? What kind of revival? If you are not specific, the revival might be someone dying in front of you and being resuscitated. One should be careful how they pray. Do you really mean what you pray?

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Meet A Need

Whining goats or sweet sheep? As for me, I do not tolerate whining, complaining, negative people. Rather than give them a shoulder to cry on, I will give them a hand, pull them up, and pray for them. When one walks with God, follows in His footsteps, there is no pause or focus to join someone for the purpose to commiserate, but rather notice their need and meet it. Jesus didn’t spend time listening to people whine – He saw their need and met it. He wasn’t a sympathetic ear; He was a problem solver. It is so much easier to meet a need for a sweet sheep than hours spent with a whining goat........just sayin'.

Monday, December 26, 2011

African CousCous - Our Christmas Tradition

This was posted a couple years ago but I have been asked again for the recipe so, here's a duplicate post. Christmas Eve is usually a huge variety of foods but Christmas Day couscous is our traditional meal.

1 Tbsp. oil ( use olive oil)
2 to 3 lbs. chicken (I use boneless, skinless breast tenders)
2 yellow onion, sliced
4 cloves finely chopped garlic
3 tsp. ground coriander (I heap the tsp.)
2 Tbsp. instant chicken bouillon (I use "Better Than Bouillon")
2 tsp. ground red pepper
2 tsp. ground turmeric (heaping)
7-9 zucchini, cut into 1/2 inch slices
2 lbs. baby carrots
2 2/3 cups of plain couscous
1 1/2 cup raisins

Cook chicken in oil until slightly brown on all sides then place in large pot. (Big stock pot) Add to large pot carrots, onions, garlic, coriander, bouillon, red pepper, and turmeric. Cover with water and heat to boiling. Let simmer a 10-15 minutes than add zucchini. Cook until chicken turns yellow and vegetables are done. Serve over couscous. (I sometimes let this simmer an hour but you don't have to wait that long.)

In a two quart bowl, mix couscous, raisins, and a 1/2 tsp. of salt then pour 2 cups of boiling water over it. Let stand 5-7 minutes until all the water is absorbed. In a large skillet, put 2 sticks (1 cup) of butter or margarine and 2 rounded/heaping tsp. ground turmeric. When butter is melted and turmeric mixed in, add the couscous. Cook and stir until all the couscous looks yellow and is fluffy like rice.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Merry Christmas!

Yes, I said it - CHRISTmas. AND, there wouldn't be Christmas if Christ had not been born. In a world that screams tolerance, can I submit the idea that tolerance is a two-way street? Can I agree to disagree? If you choose to hate the word "Christmas" and believe there is not a God, I will be more than happy to allow you to have that opinion. On the other hand, please give me the same right to say I DO believe in a God, Jesus is His name, and I LOVE Christmas. that off my, please have a very Merry Christmas. I love you!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011


Smearing malicious propaganda does not heal but rather lengthens bitter roots which attach deep in the soul never to escape eternal sorrow. - Jana Allard

A malicious person lives to injure others but will ultimately die lonely and sad regardless of status. Kindness and love will reap in kind with an abundance of happiness. The choice is yours.

Friday, February 11, 2011


It seemed to arrive quick and I am now questioning 2011, what happened to January? Was it here? Did I fall into a coma and awaken in February? YIKES! Time is moving faster than I want it. Of course, January is always the most difficult month of the year for me. The dreaded year-ending reports, tax statements, etcetera and, somewhere in there, finding time to celebrate Blake's birthday. By the way, he is now 14 years old, grew seven inches from June to September, and is proudly achieving straight "A's." He gave up soccer to spend time learning American Sign Language and is now part of a dramatic sign team ministering to hearing impaired. Friends are many and he is a loyal friend in return. Even though he now towers far above me, he still bends to kiss me every morning before leaving for school. Yes, I am a proud mom and I love my boy.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Red Velvet Cake

It's that time of year and I am still getting requests for this recipe of my husband's Red Velvet Cake. He claims you cannot substitute any item because it will not taste right nor turn out right. Follow the directions and enjoy! Have a very Merry Christmas!!!

Brian's Red Velvet Cake

1/2 cup shortening

1 & 1/2 cup sugar

2 eggs

2 tsp. cocoa

2 (1 oz.) bottles of red food coloring

1 tsp. baking soda

1 cup buttermilk

1 tsp salt

2 & 1/4 cup sifted all-purpose flour

1 tsp. vanilla

1 tsp. vinegar

Cream shortening, sugar, and eggs. Well! Mix cocoa and food coloring. Add to creamed mixture. Sift flour three times. (yes, Brian sifts it 3 times) Alternately add flour and buttermilk, beginning and ending with flour. Add vanilla. Mix vinegar and soda. Add to creamed mixture. Bake at 350. Grease and flour pans (three 9 inch cake tins). Bake 25 minutes.

Red Cake Frosting

2 cubes of Imperial margarine (He insist on Imperial)

1 cup sugar

1 tsp. vanilla

3 heaping Tbsp. flour

1 cup milk

Cream Imperial margarine, sugar, and vanilla for 5 minutes with electric mixer. Mix milk and flour then cook over medium heat stirring constantly with a whisk until thickened. Set it aside until it is completely cool. After it is cool, add to creamed mixture. Mix well. (Like thick whipping cream) Set in fridge to chill for about 30 minutes. If this is not completely cool before continuing to the next step, it will not turn out right. Mix again and then frost the cake. The secret to this frosting is enough patience to mix it long enough. Longer mixing makes better frosting.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Real Service

To give real service
you must add something
which cannot be bought or measured with money,
and that is
sincerity and integrity.
- Donald A. Adams

Monday, September 27, 2010

Stay True

Real heroes are men who fall and fail and are flawed, but win out in the end because they've stayed true to their ideals and beliefs and commitments.
- Kevin Costner

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Do Your Best

Being forced to work, and forced to do your best,
will breed in you temperance and self-control,
diligence and strength of will,
cheerfulness and content,
and a hundred virtues which the idle never know.
- Charles Kingsley

Friday, September 24, 2010

Love Deeply: Fountain of Youth?

Those who love deeply never grow old;
they may die of old age, but they die young.
- A.W. Pinero

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Sweeter Now...

4 years of dating + 31 years of marriage = 35 years
of life and love.
I'm still in love after all these years.
In fact, it is sweeter now than then.
We've come a long way, baby.
Happy Anniversary, Brian.